Do it Yourself Princess!

Today seems like the right day to say it, to stake my claim and to relentlessly get my book, “The Do It Yourself Princess”, published. Let me explain…

I’m 52. I’m in that group of people that has watched women struggle with being responsible for the domestic home lives (the cooking, cleaning, raising of precious children,…) to being critical bread winners – some by choice some by happenstance. I witnessed this as a child with a single mom from age 16. And at 40, I became a single mom with 3 young children (9, 11 and 14). At 18, I was grabbed in an elevator (and thankfully not seriously assaulted as I was able to push the guy and get out of the elevator) only to have officials tell me that even if the guy was caught his punishment would be minimal if anything – and that he was well known in the community for attacking women?! As I have risen in the marketing and advertising industry I have suffered from a litany of inappropriate comments and behaviour and in the cases where I have fought back the exhaustion has often outweighed the win/the justice. My children can attest to this as they witnessed some of it first hand when they would join me at events or when they have patiently listened as I cried tears of frustration and they are now witnessing it happen in their own circles. The truth is women and men have not been treated equally. The good news is times are changing – which is amazing!

All of this said, a few years ago I started writing a book – The DIY Princess. Like many of us I grew up being read fairy tales and watching Cinderella or Lady in Red movies. Let’s be honest, who doesn’t want to be saved by Prince Charming? But the truth is, life is far from a fairy tale…or is it? As women, here in our North American first world,  though there have been and will continue to be for some time, struggles, challenges and injustice, we can create the lives we dreamed of. Prince Charming is nice but we don’t need him to make our dreams come true. We can do this ourselves. And if in the process we happen to fall in love and meet a modern day Prince Charming – perhaps better named for our generation as a “partner” (vs a person who saves us from our lives), then that is awesome! And that is the point of The DIY Princess. It tells a bit about my story for reference and then provides a guidebook for women to create their own modern day fairy tale – with or without the charming…”partner”.

After last night’s Golden Globes I am proud to be a woman. Proud of what I have accomplished and proud of the new circle of men that I have now chosen to surround myself with. My 3 male business partners are good people, my sons are enlightened men – I am of course bias but I think they are overly aware of the challenges women face given they have been raised by a single mom and are surrounded by grandmothers, aunts and a sister who all exemplify unbelievable female leadership at home and in the workplace.

We can do this. I can do this. In fact, I have done it. My life is far from perfect but its a good life and it has taken a ton of work to get here and I still have a ton to do. Importantly though I have worked and will continue to work very hard to make the life I imagined and continue to imagine come true. I am not putting it in the hands of Prince Charming to make it happen. Making my life and dreams happen is my job. Making our lives happen and our dreams come true is all our jobs! This is a responsibility that is incumbent upon all of us regardless of gender. However, it is also incumbent upon all genders to not hinder another gender because of sexuality which is the topical conversation of the moment.

With that, I am determined to get The DIY Princess completed and published. Its right for the times. And, its my dream!

I wish you all your dreams – make them happen!

 

 

No more second guessing, I am taking the plunge…again!

A couple of days ago I posted my first vlog on the site. The vlog represents yet another turning point.

I spent the last week at SXSW in Austin – honestly it was amazing, overwhelming and inspiring. And most importantly it made me realize that I need to stop holding back.  I hold back because I question if I am making the right decision(s). I have had my share of successes and failures. And like many I focus on the failures and second guess myself continuously – its exhausting. So I went for a walk, pondered and thought I would share (after you watch the video be sure to come back and finish reading the blog)…Second Guess No More!

I am giving myself a break on a few fronts. I am quieting the annoying second guessing voice and I am going to listen to the powerful voices from SXSW that inspired what is burning inside me. The biggest learning from SouthBy was to just go for it, to try, to start and to evolve and iterate. So I am doing it!

I am not going to do anything reckless. I love the agency life, I love my work, I love teaching,…I love what I am doing but I also have this burning passion to bring DIY Princess to life and to write Adversperience 2.0.

So I am doing it! I will be blogging and vlogging and ignoring the naysayers.

Why the change of heart – because at SXSW I realized why not? What am I waiting for?

Oh ya and I got a tattoo…a permanent reminder of what matters, my goals and that hope and beauty spring eternal – but this is all for the next blog/vlog!

 

Adversperience

I wrote Adversperience in the Fall of 2014. The goal was to share with our key clients ever-changing dynamics.

This book is no longer available. A sequel is coming in Spring 2020.

If you would like a copy of Adversperience please email me at nicole@nicolegallucci.com.